Do you ever feel like everyone else has everything together while you are doing your best to hold all of the pieces of your life together? That at any moment one of those pieces might slip out of your fingers and everything will come crashing to the ground leaving you exposed... transparent...and vulnerable? That everyone else has a completely balanced life. That their houses are cutely decorated and always clean, they have the perfect meal on the table every night, and that they are successful in their jobs and never have any struggles in their marriages? Well, that is a little bit how I am feeling today.
I am not sure why I am feeling this way (I mean I know that no one has everything together...everyone has struggles and failures in life) other than that as I have been reading the many blogs that I frequent, I started to see how clean that their houses are (failure) ...the creativity/ eloquence with which they write (ummm... failure) , the beauty of their pictures or the amazing food that they made from a recipe that they just happened to come up with on a whim (failure, failure, failure).
I look at my AMAZING friends. They are all so talented in their various ways...they inspire me...and at times humble me. It can turn into a comparison game for me if I am not careful. I should have a spiritual life like her or I should have my house in perfect order at all times like her...or I should cook or look as good as her or be as thoughtful and as good of a friend as her. Why do we do things like that to ourselves? Zack gets onto me all of the time because I am SO critical of myself. He will usually get to a point where he can no longer take my self abuse and he will say "Stop beating up my wife!!" :) At least someone is sticking up for me...even if he has to at times protect me from myself!
Do other people really have it all together, or are we just so good at putting up fronts that we can fool other people into believing that our lives are perfect when in fact they are about as crazy and stressful as they could possibly get?! Is it really healthy for us to go around pretending our way through life? Wouldn't it be better to just be "real"? ...but it is a lot scarier to be real...then people might find out that you hadn't mopped your kitchen floor in a couple weeks or that you burned dinner, or feel like a failure at your job. Why is it so hard to let down your guard and to believe that people might accept you despite your failures? I think that it boils down to the fact that I couldn't imagine someone accepting me with all of my faults when I cannot even accept meyself!
Do any of you ever struggle with this, or am I completely alone?
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